Sunday, 16 January 2011

"Keep in touch"

This is something I've heard a lot of times, especially when I left England. And I have tried to keep in touch with people, mainly through Facebook, and also through handwritten letters.

I'm not always very good at keeping in touch, especially if people doesn't reply to my letters or messages, and I feel really bad about this. But lately I've kind of realised that keeping in touch is a mutual thing, it goes both ways. It doesn't work if it's only one person that tries to do it. This makes me feel a little bit better. Don't get me wrong, I won't stop talking with someone just because they're not making an effort, I just try not to worry if I haven't sent someone a message in a while.

Some people think that if you haven't talked to a person in a long time, there's not really any point in still being "friends". I can agree with  that to some extent. It depends on how your relationship used to be, if you were close friends or just work-mates or whatever.

One of my best friends, M, is very good at being logged on to Skype. I'm not. I'm good at writing letters. She's not. I guess I'm always kind of waiting to get a letter in reply before I write the next one. I should have learnt by now that that's not happening. Si in a way neither of us is very good at "keeping in touch", but we're still close friends.

I was her maid of honour at her wedding last summer. We got our act together when she asked me and we e-mailed and Skyped a lot since I was still living in England when she asked me. Even now that we live in the same country we don't really call that much or text each other.  But she's still one of my best friends and I will always be there for her, and I know she'll be there for me.

Another close friend of mine, S, is currently living in Poland studying to be a doctor. We spent a lot of time together when I lived in Oslo, she was one of my few friends there, I was mostly just bullied. I still don't like Oslo. We've not seen each other for nearly 10 years, but we still keep in touch through Facebook. We send each other birthday, Christmas and new year messages and sometimes just random messages.

We've tried to meet up several times over the years, but never managed. After I moved from Oslo, I went back down to visit her once, after that we've hardly been in the same country at the same time. S moved to Wales before I moved to England, then when I moved to England we were both to busy, S with her studies and me with settling in and work, or we didn't have enough money. Then S moved to Poland, and there's the same problem there. I hope we manage to meet up again some time in the future.


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