Look at this!

I have written another guest post at my friend Nicky's blog.

Easier said than done...

If you want to read my first guest post for Nicky, here it is:

I travel alone, for better or worse...

Guest post: What becomes of the broken hearted?

What becomes of the broken hearted?

 

By Nicky Curtis

Web author of Little Miss Dreamer

www.thelittlemissdreamer.blogspot.com

There are two certainties in life:

1. You are born, and then at some stage you die. There’s no point trying to run away from this happy little fact, you can’t beat the grim reaper, so deal with it.
2. You will have your heart broken into tiny smithereens somewhere along the way, whether you try to avoid it or not.

It’s a cheerful old life isn’t it?

There’s not a lot you can do about the first one, this is the deal you make when you enter into this world. You might not remember agreeing to this trade off, I don’t, at the time I was more concerned about the bright lights and screaming, but it really is the inevitable. So we’ll waste no more time arguing the pros and cons of that, because unless you make a deal with the devil, which I wouldn’t advise, then really you’re stuck with it.

Certainty number two however, is an event you could try to avoid, but sooner or later it will catch up with you, and if a person doesn’t do the breaking, then the loneliness will do it for you. Whichever way you spin it, basically you’re screwed.

So as Robson and Jerome sang, or whoever they stole the song from, what becomes of the broken hearted? This is a question I’m particularly keen to know the answer to, because right now my own beating heart is struggling to heal itself and any help would be greatly received.

I don’t regret the events that led to my heat being trampled on until it screamed, I opened myself up to a person I believed to be worthy of my love. He seems to be unworthy right now, although I am ever hopeful and believe that one day he’ll come good. Regardless of that, I am hurt, I am broken, and in need of fixing. The overwhelming feeling, other than ouch, is confusion. Why? I don’t understand how someone’s feeling can go from 10 and then back down to zero, mine certainly haven’t. His decisions and moods give me whiplash and deep down I know I deserve better. But can we choose who we fall in love with? I really don’t think so.

I guess that is where the problem lies.

I, like a lot of girls, am a sucker for a bad boy. Good boys don’t interest me. I like the drama, I like the excitement, I like the flattery. Yes, with that comes an element of risk, but there’s always the hope that maybe he’ll fall in love, maybe you’ll be the one to make him change.

I’ve never been a girl that thinks they’ll change, once a bad boy, always a bad boy really, but I do believe there’s some good in everyone. And that, ladies and gentleman, right there, that is why I get hurt. Because I am naive, I am stupid and I think the best of people. Not all people are good. Not all people are capable of love. Not all people are trustworthy. And not all people can be trusted with your heart.

I clearly don’t know the difference between the two species.

If you’ve ever been in this situation, you’ll know that around the time this life-altering event happens to you, everyone else in the vicinity seems to undergo some sort of positive change in their relationship/find a new love/get married etc, and you are left wondering what the hell you did to deserve it. I’m beginning to wonder whether I did something really terrible in a previous life and karma is now making me pay. The result of this sudden out-pouring of love to other people and the cup seriously running dry in your direction, is loneliness. And loneliness approximately one month prior to Christmas is not a good thing.

It will be lonely this Christmas indeed. It would have been if things were going well, considering he lives in Turkey and I live in England, but at least I would have felt something back. Right now, I feel like he’s slammed a door in my face, and I wonder if I will ever recover.

I’m assured that things will get better. I have many arguments to the contrary and unless my emotions undergo some sort of major overhaul akin to a DIY SOS transformation, then I think next year will be as difficult as this one.

What am I dreading most? Seeing him again, with someone else. Going to the place I met him, where I always go, and feeling his presence even though he’s not stood in front of me. Missing him forever more and never getting over it. Never meeting anyone else who makes me feel the way he did. I think that’s the worst one. He gave me a taste of happiness and whipped it away.

So what does become of the broken hearted?

Well, I guess look around, every person you see will either be suffering from one, recovering from one, had one, or be about to have one. I guess at the end of the day, we’re all in the same boat.

Why do we do this to ourselves? Well, they say love makes the world go around. Maybe we have to risk heartbreak to find true love.

See, I told you it was a cheerful old life ….

Like what you read?

Visit my blog: www.thelittlemissdreamer.blogspot.com

(It’s usually much more cheerful, I promise!)

It will hopefully be better now...

Sorry about being so quiet lately.

It's been a busy couple of weeks, and to top it off my laptop was throwing a wobbly, so I decided to only use it for short periods of time to check my e-mails and FB just in case it decided to die on me.

I had a look at getting my laptop fixed, it seemed like there was just a loose component or something as the picture would go all weird, but everything still worked. And also I figured that I shouldn't waste my money on a new one now that I'm travelling anyway. I went and talked to someone about it and they said it would probably be around $200 to fix it.

The laptop was a shitty cheap one that only cost maybe twice that, the keyboard wasn't working properly and neither was the mouse-pad buttons. So in the end I decided to just go and buy a new laptop (also because I'm a tech-nerd). I got some money for my birthday the other week and it would be enough to get a new one, hopefully not as crappy as the last one.

So yesterday I was running around Chermside shopping centre (NOT fun this close to Christmas, too many people! I'm glad I'm done with all my Christmas shopping!) trying to find a new one. I finally found one, well I found two, but one didn't have a DVD drive so I went with the other one. It was even less than what I was planning to spend and the shop assistant said it was a good laptop as well. I asked if they had it in stock, he said yes, one brand new one left, went into the store room to get it, only to realize it was on lay-by for someone.

When I've decided on something, especially electronic stuff, I have decided, I will rarely settle for something different. The shop-assistant said that I could order it online, it would take 5-7 working days to arrive, but at least I would get the laptop I wanted. So I thanked him and went home. I wasn't too happy about having to wait so long, but at least I had saved my files from my old laptop just in case it totally died on me.

When I got online it turned out that they don't do home deliveries on the laptop I wanted.... Typical. But they did have it in stock at another shopping centre nearby. I politely asked The Mother if she could take me to that shopping centre, which luckily she would, I booked the laptop online before we went (just in case) and it was there waiting for me when we got to the shop. YAY!!

So I am now the owner of my first Acer laptop. So far it seems good. It's a lot quicker than my old one, but that might be because I've not installed a thousand and ten things on it yet. It's strange having to get used to a new keyboard and mouse pad, but I'll get there.

I had to name my laptop when I set it up. Seeing as Kaby's Bob died, I had to give the name a second chance.

Please don't die on me Bob!!

City Sights!

Not long after I came to Brisbane I found out that the council has a bus tour called CitySights, and I have been wanting to do the tour for a while now, as I think it sounded like a good way of seeing more of Brisbane. I would not have been happy with myself if I hadn't done the tour while I was in Brisbane.

I didn't really want to do anything other than lie in bed and read some books today, but as that's all I did yesterday I thought I should probably move out of my bedroom today. So I decided since the weather was nice, and I would just keep putting it off if I didn't do it now, I might as well do that tour.

It does quite a few stops, and you can hop on and off at any of them.

The first place I hopped of was at Mt Coot-Tha. Stunning view of the city from there. I would love to go there early one morning and watch the sunrise!

The next stop I got off at was actually the one after Mt Coot-Tha; Brisbane Botanic Gardens, Mt. Coot-Tha. There Was loads of beautiful flowers there, I especially liked the Japanese Garden. I would love to go back one day as they don't do the free guided tours on Sundays.

The last place I hopped off was Chinatown. I had some lovely Chinese food at one of the restaurants for my lunch, house fried rice without prawns, yummy! I can't remember what the restaurant was called, sorry.

As I finished eating just as one of the CitySights buses had gone, and it was 45 minutes until the next one, I decided I would walk along the river back to the train station. I then also got some nice shots of Story Bridge, which was on my list of things see while I was in Brisbane.

I had a nice day, so I'm really glad I didn't just stay in bed.

But now my laptop is starting to act up, so I'm getting a bit nervous... I just hope I have time to get a memory stick and transfer my pictures to it before it decides to die!! Please don't die laptop, I've only had you for 2 years!

Serendipity

Book number 39 in the 100+ Reading Challenge

Serendipity
by Melanie La'Brooy

Outer back cover: Hero Hathaway likes her life ordered, neat. Perfect. So how does she end up in a Manhattan bar, downing cocktails and masquerading as fearless trapeze artist Lola? Not to mention flirting with the charmingly unpredictable bartender, Oscar Martin. Sparks fly, but when Hero panics and runs away, it's the end of the affair - until she bumps into Oscar in Sydney, two years later...

I liked this much better than The Wish List. It was more believable, in some ways anyway. I sat down and read the whole book today in a few hours. The book takes place over a fairly short amount of time, it jumps from Hero and Oscar meeting in Manhattan to two years later, but the feel of the book isn't rushed because of it or anything.

The way both Hero and Oscar act can seem very over the top, but it kind of gets explained in a way that makes it justified. I wouldn't mind if someone would send an Oscar my way actually! Haha.

Eatons Hill Tavern 2

For my first post about Eatons Hill Tavern click here.

We went to Eatons Hill again last night. The Mother called EHT earlier this week asking if my passport would be accepted at the door and explaining the trouble we had last time. She was told that I should be able to get in with a passport no problem as they weren't allowed to not accept passports. The lady The Mother talked to also gave us the name of the manager that was on last night so that we could talk to him if there was any trouble.

Even though The Mother had called and made sure I would get in with my passport we were still nervous there would be some drama.

I got to the door, gave my passport to the doorman, he said "We don't get many people from Norway here!", typed something into his machine, scanned it and let me in! Yay!

Maybe they had been warned that someone would come with a passport? Haha! Or maybe they realized that not letting people in unless they have an Australian driver's licence is very discriminating?

We had a good night though. I kept wishing that The Paramedic would come, but he had to get up at 5am today for work. I hadn't eaten since lunch, so I got very drunk, very quickly. But not so drunk that I didn't know what I was doing, or can't remember what happened last night today.

The Wish List

Book number 38 in the 100+ Reading Challenge

The Wish List
by Melanie La'Brooy

Outer back cover: Who says a modern girl can't believe in fairy tales?
Lucy is a hopeless romantic who drives her friends crazy as she tries to make her old boyfriend Tom fall in love with her again.
Then Lucy meets the man of her dreams - or so it seems - and must finally decide whether true love is fact, fiction, or something in between.

It was a fun book. I didn't feel it was very exciting as I was reading it, but at the same time I found it hard to put down once I got into it.

One thing I didn't like was that some of the characters were VERY stereotyped. They weren't very believable, I'm not saying that people aren't like the way they were described in the book, but it's very rare. And when I read a book I like to think that it could be real, which was occasionally hard because of how some of the characters acted.

But It was an okay book. Made me chuckle a few times.

The Madness Meme, Part 2

Here is Part 2 of the meme I started last Sunday, found at Sunday Stealing. For Part 1 click here.

23. Do you ever walk around the house naked? No. I haven't when I've lived on my own either. I'm too worried that someone might see me through the window or someone comes to visit or something.
24. If you were an animal what would you be? Why? Probably a cat. That way I can lie and not do anything all day and people think it's normal. Haha!
25. Hair color you like on someone you're dating? I don't really care, I've been attracted to men with all hair colors.
26. If suffering an injury, would you rather be left blind or deaf? I'm part deaf after a football/soccer incident already, and I would prefer going completely deaf to completely blind. That way I can still see all the beautiful things around us.
27. Do you have any special talents? I can put my knees behind my head when I'm lying down on the floor...? Oh, and instead of just curling my tongue I can also make "the clover" or whatever you want to call it.
28. What do you do as soon as you walk in the house? Put my feet on the floor.
29. Do you like horror or comedy? Comedy. I used to love horror movies when I was younger, but I seem to have become more of a "chicken". Horror movies aren't too bad if I've got a nice man next to me though.
30. Are you missing anyone? I miss some of my friends back in Norway and England.
31. Where do you want to live when you are old? I don't quite know yet.
32. Who is the person you can count on the most? Probably my mother.
33. If you could date any celebrity past or present, who would it be? Kellan Lutz or Kunal Nayyar maybe, I follow them both on twitter and they both seem like really nice guys, they're rather easy on the eye too.
34. What did you dream last night? I hardly ever remember my dreams.
35. What is your favorite sport to watch? I don't really watch sports. With the right people with you, any sport can be fun to watch.
36. Are you named after anyone? No. Not that my parent have told me anyway.
37. What is your favorite alcoholic drink? I usually drink Smirnoff Ice when I'm out, or a sweet white or rose wine. But I absolutely LOVE cocktails, not sure which one is my favorite though.
38. Non alcoholic drink? Water.
39. Have you ever been in love? Yes.
40. Do you sing in the shower? Rarely, and only if there is no one else in the house!
41. Have you ever been arrested? No, and I hope I never am.
42. What is your favorite Holiday? Not sure. Maybe Christmas/New Years, because of all the nice decorations.
43. Would you ever get plastic surgery? I would love to say no on this one, but I don't know what might happen in the future.
44. Have you ever caught a fish? es, I used to go fishing with my granddad a lot when I was younger, I once caught 5 on the same line!

Like nails on a blackboard!

I went with the mother to the chiropractor today, because last time she went he had told her to bring someone in case he needed an extra pair of hands. Let me tell you, it made me try a lot harder to look after my own back and neck! Bad backs are in my family, so I should be careful with it anyway. But seeing what actually happens at the chiropractor's? Urgh!

You know how some people find the sound of nails on a blackboard really irritating? For some people it can be something else, like whistling or a knife against a plate, etc.

When the chiropractor grabbed The Mothers head and turned it quickly, (you know what I'm talking about? Looked like he was going to kill her by twisting her neck to the side!) I didn't like that at all!!! The sound, the way it looked... No thank you! That's actually the main reason I want to try and take better care of my neck and back now.

Of course all the other things about having a bad back and isn't good either, but that was my main thing. I don't want anybody to do that to my neck!! Just looking at it made shivers go down my spine and I felt a bit nauseated.

I should probably have my back checked though at some point, as however much I might hate that neck-twisting, it's better to try and fix it than for it to just get worse and worse. I might book an appointment when I go back to Norway.

Ants, ants and more ants!!

One of the things people don't really tell you about Australia is how many ants there are!

They're everywhere!

I'm not scared of ants or anything, and I don't really mind them. As long as they stay outside!

The last week there has been loads of ants inside the house, which is driving me potty! People keep telling me that when the ants come inside that means it's going to rain... It's been sunny and close to 30 degrees all week!

The thing that really bugs (no pun intended) me with having the ants inside is that I keep thinking the house must be filthy! So I've had two "OCD-attacks" this week, the second one today. I was close to getting the toothbrush out to make sure that it was clean between the tiles just so that the ants would go away. It wasn't so bad after I'd cleaned the floors, and taken both bins out. I probably hoovered up a couple of hundred ants as well. But they started to come back in again, not as many as before, but still. I just had to walk away from where they were coming in to calm down. If not I would probably still be cleaning.

So if you find this by Googling "Things to know about Australia", "Facts about Australia", or anything else that brings you here, just know:

THERE ARE ANTS EVERYWHERE!!!

That's one of the things people don't tell you about Australia....

Haircut and animals

Sorry about the lack of posts this week guys!

On Wednesday I had an extra day off. It was The Boy's first birthday so The Mother took the day off work, meaning I got the day off. So I went to a shopping centre nearby(ish) for some retail therapy. It's one of Australia's biggest shopping centres and I've only been there twice before but never had a proper look around. Chermside it's called. Anyway.

I had a nice day, I had a proper bra-fitting for the first time in my life, got a couple of new clothes, a Christmas present, a new diary and a haircut. I've not gotten my hair cut in ages! My hair is really thick, and it had gotten quite long, so it was rather heavy. I always regret it when I have a hair cut though so I told them I still wanted it below my shoulders. When I told the hairdresser how "short" I wanted it she asked if I was sure... I wasn't, but it's only hair right, it grows back out again, so I got her to cut it. And also thin it out a bit. I'm seriously not kidding when I say my hair is think, hairdressers (and other people) always comment on it.

When I was finished I looked at the floor. LOADS of hair! But I just thought it was because my hair was so thick. Then I got The Mother to take a picture of it when I got home. I had also taken a picture the same morning because I was planning to get a haircut in the near future. It was quite a bit shorter, I don't think I had quite realized how long my hair had actually gotten!

And no, I did not dye it, it's just the different light or something..

While I don't regret my haircut this time (must be because it's still below shoulder length), I still want to grow it long again. But this time I will get it trimmed and thinned out regularly so that it's lighter and healthier.

I went to see The Paramedic again yesterday.... Hmmmm... I'm going to TRY no to invest too much emotion in that, not get too emotionally involved, not yet anyway, I'll have to see how it goes first. I'll give him a few more chances, he's difficult to read.

Today we went to Australia Zoo again. Last time we went we got some tickets with free entry until Christmas so we went today to see the new Africa part of the zoo.

It was okay. The cheetahs were being checked up by the vet or something so we didn't get to see them, and the only other animals they had were the zebras, rhinoceroses and giraffes. It was still cool to see those animals of course, but I think I expected more the way they had been going on about it.

Only thing missing from this picture is a baboon holding a lion cub...

After we saw the Africa part we had a little wander through the "regular" part of the zoo.

At one point while we were walking through the zoo there was a lizard following me! I think lizards are really cool, but I have to say this one freaked me out a little bit. At first it would run towards me when I had my back turned and freeze as soon as I looked at it. But then it just didn't care anymore and came straight towards us. Turned out it was chasing another, smaller, lizard though.

After we had walked around Australia Zoo for a while we went to Melaney for lunch. Very cute little place, reminded me a little bit of Kuranda, it had the same hippey-y feel about it.

After Melaney we went to Gerrard Lookout. Very beautiful view.

So that's pretty much what's happened this week, other than work. Hope you all have an amazing week next week!

The Madness Meme, Part 1

I found another meme over at Sunday Stealing today that I thought looked fun, so here goes!

1. Have you ever licked the back of a CD to try to get it to work? Can't say I have, no. Do people actually do that?
2. What's the larges age difference between you and someone you've dated? I went on a date once with a guy that was 19 years older than me! Nice guy, I just couldn't get past the age difference...
3. Ever been in a car wreck? No
4. Were you popular in high school? No and I wish I could go back in time and go again with the knowledge I have now as then I wouldn't be so self conscious.
5 Have you ever been on a blind date? No, could be interesting to try though...
6. Are looks important? I'd like to say no, but looks are the first thing you notice in a person, unless you're blind or the first time you talk to them is on the phone. But how you perceive their looks can change after you get to know a person. So yes when it comes to first-impressions, and when you get to know them then it can be yes or no depending on their personality and how you get along with them....
7. Do you have any friends that you've known for 10 years or more? Yes
8. By what age would you like to be married? I'm not really that bothered about marriage, I don't need a ring or a document to prove that I love someone.
9. Does the number of people a person's slept with affect your view of them? I hope not.... Don't think so... I don't really ask people how many people they've slept with though.
10. Have you ever made a mistake? Just like everyone else I've made loads of mistakes. That's how you learn though and part of what makes you you.
11. Are you a good tipper? Depends on the service, I don't get it when people leave a large tip after they've gotten horrible service.
12. What's the most you have spent for a haircut? I don't know, I usually go to cheap places or get someone to do it for free, after all, it's just hair, it'll grow back out again.
13. Have you ever had a crush on a teacher? I think most people do at some stage of their life, so yes.
14. Have you ever peed in public? I've used public toilets, and peed in the forest, does that count?
15. What song do you want played at your funeral? Not really given it much though, don't know.
16. Would you tell your parents if you were gay? I don't know. I'd probably just introduce them to a girlfriend or something....
17. What would your last meal be before getting executed? Probably something boring like Spaghetti Bolognese (Yummy).
18. Beatles or Stones? Both.
19. If you had to pick one person on earth to die, who would it be? I'm not going to tell you, because I don't want to explain it.
20. Beer, wine or hard liquor? Wine, white or rose, sweet.
21. Do you have any phobias? I'm terrified of spiders!!!
22. What are your plans for the future? I hate this question, unfortunately they ask it at most job interviews so I should really have an answer ready. I pretty much just go with the flow. I'd like to travel some more, find out what I want to work with, study, and find a guy!